Well hello there!


I’m Ruby Sue, and I’m a relatively young and new swinger who is blogging about navigating the swinging lifestyle and exploring sexuality for the sensually shy.

When I was younger, I totally thought I was liberated and comfortable with my sexuality. I wouldn’t blush at going into a sex store, and I was an ardent advocate for gay rights despite my very conservative family/friend circles.

As I got older, I got into a few relationships with rather conservative and closeted fellas that were really uncomfortable with sexuality and expression.  One guy I dated for over three years in college was too embarrassed to buy condoms (face palm) for some unknown reason, and another, even after a few drinks, couldn’t handle being in a sex shop and just awkwardly trailed me for fifteen minutes until I gave up and left.

I hopped from monogamous relationship to monogamous relationship, I realized I wanted more.  As I started delving into the world of swinging and polyamory, I felt like the world’s biggest prude. There was an array of toys I’d never seen and the online dating sites for swingers struck me as lewd.


When did I become such a prude by comparison?


I never considered myself sexually repressed, but by contrast to the sexuality bloggers out there, I felt like I was totally green to not only the scene, but even my own sexual identity.

If you’re anything like me- you may feel like you’re straddling both worlds.  You don’t feel you fit the stereotype of the pierced, pink haired sex shop workers, nor do you feel appalled by BDSM, you just haven’t really nailed down if it’s for you.

I have been an advocate for gay rights for over a decade, yet when it came to my own sexuality, I still felt closeted, unsure, and yes- somewhat ashamed.

I’m proud to be “vanilla” by some standards, but it’s not all that defines me. This blog is helping me sift through those labels & explore.




Feel free to contact me at vanillawithsprinklesblog (at) gmail.com!